As the lone wolf man of my household, I learn daily from the thoughts and actions of women. This Spring semester has been particularly enlightening, bolstered by my eldest daughter's role as a munchkin in Bishop McCort's musical rendition of The Wizard of Oz. Without further ado, here is my Top 10 of the season, covering my April to May education taught by a wife, a 10-year old, and an 8-year-old:
#10: Bike Brain
Weeks prior to Oz, my female trio attended Westmont Hilltop's musical, Into The Woods. I, being the clever fella that I am, convinced my family that I needed to literally go into the woods instead of attend this performance. Clearance granted. A showstopping Dad move.
And then, on The Path of the Flood trail, I crashed on my bicycle. Like Wiley Coyote gets an ACME explosive dropped on him by Roadrunner crashed. Exiting the Staple Bend Tunnel and crossing a wet bridge, my bicycle made a Looney Tunes left. My body went hard right. In a second, the soundtrack to my life was written: A Dumb Dad in the Dirt.
Thankfully, thy helmet protected thy cranium. Once I confirmed I was alive and retrieved my wheeled transportation, I had one more mile to bike for Subaru refuge. My right leg was bleeding, adrenaline was pumping, and I was internally repeating "I am such an idiot" like "There is no place like home". When I indeed got home, I had my mother, a retired nurse, come out of retirement for an unpaid, 20 minute traveling nurse appointment. She assessed my right eye socket, right cheekbone, right leg, and entire ego.
When my girls got home from Into The Woods, I was on the couch, using two ice packs, showing off my versatility and courage.
With one eye, I was watching televised golf.
And we lived happily ever after.
#9: Bird Brain
Weeks later and completely healed (not counting my pride), I had the pleasure of touring the Powdermill Nature Reserve in the heart of the Laurel Highlands. From bike buffoon to bird nerd, I was in an ornithology heaven on Earth. Hidden in the woodlands of Rector, Powdermill is a powerhouse of birding. I got to observe how birds are banded, tracked, and studied. I learned that the black and white warbler is nicknamed the "Oreo bird". I was grateful that I was no longer black and blue and able to fully appreciate this Mother Nature experience. To Bird Nerd Nation, I salute you.
#8: Heart Award
Counting the parents only performance of Wizard of Oz, I spent four consecutive nights in the auditorium (Kansas). By the time we got to the final performance on Saturday, I was picking out subtle differences in stage design and had consumed a tornado of popcorn. The resounding breakthrough performance, the Heart Award, goes to the girl who played Tin Man. She did this deep voiced, pathetic cry that was so perfectly heartless.
And to all the kids who starred in Wizard of Oz, congratulations. I cannot remember the last time I watched the 1939 classic, but in 2025, a dedicated collection of kids and one dynamic musical director set the stage on fire.
The Wicked Witch literally used fire on stage.
Pyromaniac.
#7: Leg Forward
At BOLD Crossfit this spring, my wife and I have conquered a variety of workouts to supplement the rigors of parenting theatre kids. This has given us the leg power to push the Subaru pedal to transport them to practices, get ice cream, etc. Above all, box jumps, air squats, lunges, assault biking and dead lifting have made us more humble, happy humans.
That springtime energy and effort to date leads us to Memorial Day weekend, where two events separated by 48 hours, will demonstrate how the benefits of community exercise go well beyond physical. On Saturday, 5/24 The Path of the Flood Historic Races return. I will be running with a pack all destined for the finish line @ Peoples Natural Gas Park, the site of my wedding reception.
Sorry, our wedding reception. 12 years into marriage, I should know better.
To all those running in the 5K, 8 miler, or 14 miler, good luck. Run your race.
And then on Memorial Day morning, The Murph Challenge is on. 1 mile run (Lions), 100 pull ups (And Tigers) , 200 push ups (And Bears), and 300 air squats (Oh My!)
And then another 1 mile run (Oh S***).
My wife and I are going to give it our best shot. Our daughters will be at BOLD to cheer us on and support the small army of Crossfit athletes willing to give it a go.
Thanks to Michael Murphy who served his country, lost his life in service, and now brings people together for one glorious workout.
As the Lion learns in Oz, wisdom is stronger that courage. Grit inspires.
#6: Lean Forward
My 4-year-old niece is playing in her first season of tee ball. When on the field, she gets in textbook deadlift position and puts her glove on the dirt. Her form is impeccable as she just waits for a ball to roll into her mitt. Besides chewing bubble gum, she is motionless. America's pasttime at its finest.
Her team, sponsored by the Johnstown Mill Rats, follows their own Yellow Brick Road to home plate. Watching bobblehead kids run the bases is true theatre. Some scream. Some look lost. Some have to be enticed to keep going. At one point, a fielder on the opposition was doing dirt angels near the pitcher's mound. It is One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest meets Angels in the Outfield.
The Johnstown Mill Rats home opener is at 7pm on Tuesday, 5/27. Our family of four will be there.
Two of us will be sore from The Murph and might need to bring seat cushions.
Bleachers (Oh S***).
#5: Westward
The Wicked Witch of the West is dead. I watched her die 4 times, so it is officially over.
And in June, to celebrate, our family is headed to Colorado, Wyoming, and Montana. In between my bicycle accident, finding Toto, and trying to fine tune my 41-year-old body, I have planned a Wild West expedition for the ages.
Go big or go home.
We are not in Kansas anymore (went in 2024).
Eat your heart out. (Sorry, Tinman) (pathetic cry).
#4: Go Back in Time
Inspired by our westward expansion trip coming this June, my wife and I decided to start the series Yellowstone.
On DVD.
On a portal DVD player with a 16-inch BIG screen.
We rent the DVDs from the library.
In early May, I had to pay a 50 cent late fee for Season 4 of Yellowstone.
If you have seen the show, imagine me as Rip. Imagine me walking up to the library checkout and being informed that I have an unpaid debt.
I just stare at the library woman. I tell her to keep the change.
And I get on my horse and head back to the ranch.
#3: Go Further Back in Time
As a chaperone on my daughter's 2nd grade field trip, I provided Dad supervision @ Somerset Historical Center. This trip took place on a rain soaked Tuesday that led to localized flooding. We, the 2nd grade settlers, got to experience settling while the glades were sloppy and schools were getting early dismissals. We learned about cornmeal mush, the pack horse, red clay pottery, the spider skillet, and of course, the tinsmith. There would be no Tinman without the Tinsmith.
Thanks to all the Historical Center staff for trudging and educating us. I enjoyed learning what it was like living off the land without a DVD player.
As John Dutton warns, "I am the opposite of progress."
#2: A Little Left to Go
The school year is almost over and a sincere thank you to all my daughters' teachers over the years. From preschool to present day, an attitude of gratitude for educators. On the field trip I was responsible for two boys for around three hours. They were what I once was...
Lunatics.
I imagined what it would have been like traveling with them in the 1700s. I imagined what it would be like having them in a classroom all day. As the only male chaperone, I manned the boys bathroom during the field trip and it was barbaric.
I will never curse the volume of Barbies in our house again.
Girl Dad strong.
#1: The Time is Now
In Oz, Dorothy takes us on an epic adventure fueled by her relationships, her ambition, and ultimately, the joy of returning home. Her story has stood the test time. Her friends, the Scarecrow, the Tin Man, and the Lion, have resonated with generations...I think because we all can relate to their colorful characters.
And all good stories need good characters. I am grateful for all the people described in this blog, in this community tale. I am grateful I live in a time of blogging. I would have been a bankrupt blacksmith. If I cannot pedal my bike across a wet bridge, God only knows how I would have met my doom on the settlement.
As we power toward the end of the school year and the beginning of summer, show some grit. Support local music and races. Appreciate kids for simply being kids and be a kid at heart. When in doubt, wear a helmet. It might just save your life.
To life, liberty, and the pursuit of the final episodes of Yellowstone (not on DVD yet!)
Carry on, Johnstown.
