Weekend Play-By-Play

In the spirit of football season, this is a play-by-play for the last weekend of August 2018. Like football, parenting can be intense with the potential for blindside hits, illegal formations, and heroic combinations.

Saturday

4:00 A.M. - My youngest running back (age 17 months) decides to stand in her crib and yell to her Mom. Not a scream or panic attack, just a loud request. Little does she know, her Mom is sleeping in her sister's room at the time.

4:15 A.M. - She finally switches to "Dad". Her request sounds more aggressive, but judging tact and tone is difficult at this hour.

4:20 A.M. - I take my youngest scrapper to the recliner. She finds comfort. For the next 2.5 hours she sleeps. I twitch and live in a state of fear - not wanting her to wake up, not wanting to fully fall asleep. It is "rest".

7:00 A.M. -  Our family of four begins to get ready for a "big day", the two-word description for every 24 hours on Earth.

8:55 A.M. - Depart for Stackhouse Park for the Run Park 5K followed by the Park Picnic and Jamboree. I  lovingly tell my wife en route, "If you don't see me at the finish line, it's okay, I just needed some more time alone."

9:30 A.M. - Race begins. Forest freedom.

9:59 A.M. - Cross the finish line as my wife, kids, and my parents cheer me on. Grateful for my family and the park I absolutely love.

10:00 A.M. - 11:30 A.M. -  Participate in a gauntlet of Jamboree activities: make sunglasses, pet dogs, eat hot dogs, run through hula hoops, eat corn on the cob, listen to music, nervously watch children cross a stream bridge, eat more corn on the cob.

1:00 P.M. - Mom gets a "parental hiatus" to restore order in the home and in her brain. I quarterback a trip to a 2-year-old birthday party. My mother sits shotgun. Both girls strapped in and making noise.

1:15 P.M. -3:30 P.M. - Attend an epic birthday party that features homemade pizza, an ice cream truck, and music blasting out of the garage. It was an awesome party. One I would never, never, never want to organize and orchestrate. Parents just wandered the grounds, all thinking the same thing - "Great party...this clean up is going to be awful."

3:45 P.M. - My oldest daughter (3 years, 7 months) is calling me "Mom" and in a vulnerable haze. Her body wishes to escape reality, while her mind refuses to embrace naptime.

4:00 P.M. - Subaru-induced sleep.

7:00 P.M. - Our family hosts a fire in our backyard. Multiple children and parents attend. Fire provides warmth and danger. Mothers and fathers protect their young while enjoying open flame.

10:00 P.M. - Fire out. No one fell in. Live to see another day. My oldest wants to sleep outside. We head in .

Sunday

3:00 A.M. - My oldest wakes me up in "our fort". She declares "I am not sleepy". We transition from fort to bed.

7:30 A.M. - Mom and our youngest burst into the room. "Wakey, wakey, we don't have time for eggs and bacy".

9:00 A.M. - Café Sunday @ Mill House Café in Westmont. My kids have grown to love this fellowship. They learn about faith, music and community in one super swoop. At one point, my oldest disagrees with the lyric "Oh my God". She corrects everyone with "Oh my Gosh". Get it right or pay the price.

11:00 A.M. - Spirituality Round 2 @ Our Mother of Sorrows mass. In the 4th quarter, aka the halfway point of mass, things get a little violent (spilled goldfish, screaming, pew dash, team meeting, intercept kids). I take the youngest on to the streets for 1-on-1 counseling. Mom heads back into the Catholic huddle with our veteran.

11:45 A.M. - I do my job. I go to communion with a cute, sleeping daughter. Everyone looks at me and thinks, "what a composed father". Minutes before, we were sweating on the sidewalk and talking to ourselves.

12:15 P.M. - Parish picnic outside the church that incorporates water. Fire on Saturday. Water on Sunday. Parents watch their children dodge aquatic dangers while discussing the rigors of parenting. At one point, my youngest daughter sits alone on the pavement, pushing stones and dirt around with pure joy.

2:30 P.M. - My wife takes our oldest to a 1-year-old's birthday party. My youngest and I are designated to watch golf on television. This was her idea.

3:00 P.M. - My wife is in the thick of a birthday party bonanza @ Heritage Discovery Center. She reports it was awesome. She never, never, never wants to organize or orchestrate such a scene. I report watching golf was awesome. I never, never, never want to attend a PGA event, but I recognize it is my Dad duty to live out my golf dreams on my parents' couch.

 4:30 P.M.- My youngest and I depart Westmont and hike through Stackhouse back to Brownstown. I push our adventure stroller while she goes along for the ride. She protects her baby doll from critters.

6:30 P.M. - Porch dinner and discover that baby robins have hatched in our front yard tree. The crowd goes wild. Mother robin looks concerned. Her nest is on lunatic property.

8:00 P.M. - My wife and I decide to take the kids to Shaffer's Frosty Freeze. Hard day, soft serve.

9:15 P.M. - Oldest daughter is mesmerized by an "orangish moon". We pull the Subaru up to the Inclined Plane lookout to get a better glimpse. A small army of high school kids are talking about their semester schedules. My daughter will begin school in September. She's ready, no doubt. She currently thinks the moon comes out of the sun.

Two days.

Two kids.

Two parents.

One fun place to build a family.

Goodnight Johnstown, big day ahead.