Dear 2020,

Dear 2020,

I'm celebrating your halfway point tonight. You have been relentless. Remember what we did on Day 1 together? We were in Walt Disney World. Magic Kingdom. By the end of March, you know where I was? Mayhem Kingdom. Jasmine did not prepare me for this Whole New World. A world where there is no school and no play dates. If I'm wearing a mask in October, it better be for Trick-or-Treat and Trick-or-Treat only.

My 5-year-old knows a song with "quaratine" in the lyrics. How does that make you feel, 2020? Innocence of youth vanished like toilet paper. You know what one of her most embarassing moments was in this calendar year? A 4-year-old knew what coronavirus was and she didn't. I guess I'm the bad parent, 2020. Sorry, I didn't even know what the word pandemic was until this year. I want to go back to simpler times. Like in 1999, when our biggest concern was the Mayan calendar ending civilization.

Oh, and as for our 2-year-old, she turned 3 on Saint Patrick's Day. You know who was going to dress up like a leprechaun at her sister's school and leave a childhood memory for the ages? Me. And that didn't happen. But, you know what did happen? My 3-year-old still pees the bed and I blame you. You messed up everyone's sense of timing. We are lucky we know what day it is anymore. Today is Tuesday. Taco Tuesday. We got them from Taco Chellz, a new restaurant in town. They were delicious. Oh yeah, you tried to doom small businesses and force families to eat together at their dining room tables.

You also have made us even more dependent on technology. Yes, I'm writing on a blog that is posted online. I get it. But, Instagram can be Instagone. Twitter, fly away. Everyone is on an online opinion rampage. Saving grace- America's Got Talent is back. The nightly news, aka America's Got Problems, will be drowned out by four people judging others. 2020, we crave judgement.

Yes, this is Positive Johnstown. I'm trying to provide some laughs. Don't be so serious. Have a sense of humor. I've got an arsenal full of gratitude and I'll unleash it every step of the way until 2021. I know we have a long way to go. Don't worry about who I am voting for in November. If I had to do it today, I'd write in Santa Claus and slam dunk a chocolate chip cookie. If there is one person I want in the oval office, it is that big, fat, jolly man...or Mrs. Claus. Doesn't matter. Either of the Claus.

Tomorrow is July. I'm inviting Santa for a Christmas in July party at our house. I don't know if our friends will be allowed to come, but whatever. Santa can come. His beard is pretty much a mask anyway. Maybe, I'll bring this full circle and invite Mickey Mouse. Maybe he can be the VP...or Minnie Mouse. Doesn't matter. Either of the Mice.

Well, 2020, I'm signing off. Ease up a bit for the second half. I'll speak for all of humanity when I say, relax. I can't tell if you've gone fast or slow, but you've gone in an utterly bonkers direction.

I hope this blog finds you well. I hope you "like" my blog. If you don't "like" it, please don't go on one of those judgement rampages. It is not doing the world any good.

I'll write to you again in six months. Peace be with you.