With 2 kids, a loving wife, and a day off work, I could have created a Halloween Top 50 list; however, my kids would be neglected, my wife would not be feeling the love, and I'd be typing until Thanksgiving. So, here it is...my family will be in their Haloween costume character for the entire blog:
Dad - Shark
Mom - Swan
3-year-old - SuperWoman
1-year-old - Piglet
#10: "Why is everyone calling me THAT?"
After a full day of being called "Super Girl", SuperWoman had enough. Under the light of the moon on the stoop of a stranger, SuperWoman loudly asked this question. Outraged, she took her candy. Shark politely explained to the homeowners that his SuperWoman was not an egomaniac and quite simply dedicated to fighting crime.
#9: Shark Attack
With Swan behind the wheel, Shark saw a friend getting ready for Trick-or-Treat. We stopped the Subaru and Shark got out of the car in excitement. Shark exclaimed the whole family would be stopping by soon. Stepping back into the Outback, Shark awkwardly shut the door on his fin, located on the human skull. Shark did not realize he did this at first. Shark felt resistance putting on his seat belt. Swan laughed. Shark is an idiot.
#8: Piglet's Power Trip
During lunch at the Boulevard Grill, Piglet had a pre-nap mental breakdown. As Swan gave child psychology a whirl, Shark stared at a muted ESPN. The Green Bay Packers traded safety Ha Ha Clinton Dix. "If you don't calm down, you are going to be traded like Ha Ha Clinton Dix", Shark to Piglet (did not say, but should have).
#7 The Nap
It should be #1, but once we got home from lunch, the Halloween snooze was the treat of all treats. Shark, Swan, SuperWoman, and Piglet all got Zs at the same time. When Shark and SuperWoman awoke they did the obvious - drank a Yoo-hoo. Rich in calcium and Vitamin D, Yoo-hoo is a healthy alternative on Halloween.
#6 The Great Pumpkin Paint
Closing in on 70 degrees, our family gathered in the front yard to paint a white pumpkin. Piglet preferred to paint the sidewalk and had to be instructed to not paint the house. SuperWoman required no instruction and used an exorbitant amount of paint. Shark and Swan wandered the grounds looking for things to pick up.
#5 Fruit Island
Shark sends a desperate mid-Trick-or-Treat text to his parents. The message - prepare a fruit platter or we are never going to survive. In a race against time, strawberries, apples, and bananas provided a jolt of juiciness.
#4 Hundred Acre Wood
Upon arriving at a friend's abode, Piglet meets up with a 1-month-old Winnie the Pooh and a canine disguised as a donkey, a donkey named Eeyore. All three - pig, bear, and donkey - look somewhat uncomfortable, yet satisfied. SuperWoman runs through the grass disinterested in childish affairs.
#3 Snack Time
Shark, Swan, and Piglet get to experience Geneva Preschool along with other parents and offspring. Shark volunteers to pass out cupcakes, one of the greatest culinary creations. There is also a veggie tray during the snack time extravaganza. While Shark got to pass out cupcakes and see the joy in the eyes of children, someone else had to ask if anyone wanted cauliflower.
#2 The Spider Walk
After snack time, each preschooler had the opportunity to walk across a wooden beam. To the left and right, cobwebs, spiders, and certain death. The hallway was tight and full of family members. Shark held on to Piglet. Swan held on to memories. SuperWoman placed her feet on the beam. Her cape began to rise and then suddenly...she was gone. She flew out of the preschool to fight crime. We are so proud of her.
#1 Support the Troops
Maybe Swan's best idea ever - a wealth of our Trick-or-Treat candy is going overseas. SuperWoman and Piglet were not consulted on this decision. The Kit-Kats are headed to Kuwait! Years from now, SuperWoman and Piglet can read this blog and question Swan on why she decided to send their candy out of the country. "Girls, did you see that Ha Ha Clinton Dix retired?", Shark.
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